I have to help myself first right now

I just experienced something very strange. I picked up my son from school today and from the moment he put his little hand in mine he was asking about his toy ice cream truck. This was the toy that he was focused on playing with today (not the school bus, not the microwave, not Peppa, but the ...

Is it dark in heaven?

This morning, after dropping my daughter off for her last day of second grade, my son and I were engaged in one of our typical drive-to-school chats. "Mommy, can you tell me a scary story? How about 'The Haunted Rock' or 'The Broken Elevator in the Toy Store,' can you tell me those scary stories, and make them ...

My five favorite things

Yesterday, over on Instagram, I posted a story in which I asked an honest question and for which I wanted an honest answer: despite the fact that most of my posts address serious topics, how would you feel about a post about beauty/self-care products? I, personally, love learning what other people use and love, but I wanted to ...

13 Reasons Why

Almost exactly one year ago (literally - it was May 24, 2017) I published a hard, raw, potentially controversial post entitled, I am a 32-year-old Mom and Here are the Thirteen Reasons Why I Can Relate to Hannah Baker. I had finished watching the Netflix series for the second time (Ok..maybe it was the third...or fourth?) and felt so, ...

The Hardest Post

This post - titled, "The Hardest Post I've Ever Written," was originally published on here on February 24, 2014: on my son's four-month-birthday.  That means, of course, that this was written at exactly four months postpartum, for me. I am re-posting this, today, to give context to some of what is to come; some of what ...

a squeeze kiss and ice cream trucks.

In August, I told my son about the fact that I'd had severe postpartum depression after he was born. I did not use those words, of course; rather, I told him that "I got a little sad" and he understood it and did not understand it and it was a pretty good balance. In January, my book came out and I ...

11 things

The other day, in this post, I promised that I would blog more. Some of the blog posts will be long and serious, Some will be short, little vignettes. And some will be totally random. Welcome to totally random. This post is being brought to you by the fact that over the past few days I ...

At peace

I thought of something, today. Something that I do not think you know about me: when I feel most at peace. If you were ever to ask me this question, I think that my initial, instinctual answer would be something like, "When my whole family is together under one roof, all safe and accounted for, I feel most ...

Mommy Gut

As humans, we are often told to listen to our hearts. We are told to pay attention to our "inner voice" and that its words should reign supreme over all else. There is an actual movement surrounding a greater effort to pay attention to our feelings, and while this is something that I would ordinarily get behind (and, in ...

Why I wrote “Beyond the Baby Blues”

(Originally published on postpartum project, as "Why I wrote "Beyond the Baby Blues") *** “If this can help one woman then it is worth it.” That was my refrain. That was what I said. That was what I typed, even when my hands trembled. In February of 2014 I made a decision that would change the trajectory of my life ...