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The hardest post I’ve ever written.

Since having my second child my world has changed in more ways than I could have imagined. As our triangle turned into a square (quite seamlessly in many ways, I should say), I have experienced love and joy that I had not yet known. And one positive thing that I have done has been starting 511, ...

The hardest post I’ve ever written, Part 3.

Life works in amazing ways. This is hardest part of the hardest post. And though I've been so overwhelmingly grateful for the outpouring of support, both publicly and privately, that I have received thus far, it is still hard to put all of these things into plain words. This has been a life changing experience to me, ...

The hardest post I’ve ever written, Part 2.

As I mentioned in Part 1 of this story, my Fall and Winter got very dark. So I warn you to proceed with caution. Because if you know me, you know that I am a happy person. That I'm always smiling, that I love children and that I have dance parties every day. This is a different ...

The hardest post I’ve ever written, Part 1.

The Hardest Post

This post - titled, "The Hardest Post I've Ever Written," was originally published on here on February 24, 2014: on my son's four-month-birthday. That means, of course, that this was written at exactly four months postpartum, for me. I am re-posting this, today, to give context to some of what is to come; some of what ...

The Hardest Part.

When I wrote The hardest post I've ever written, I wrote about my struggles with peri- and postpartum depression. But in it, I proclaimed that the hardest part of the hardest post was having to type the following words: I can no longer have children. In it I also wrote how incredibly grateful I am for having ...

A (partial) Day in the Life of a Mother With Two Young Children and Postpartum Depression

4:40 am wake up because I think I hear a noise outside. I go down to investigate. Twice. The mystery remains unsolved. 6:15 wake up to the sound of my daughter's voice. She had previously been instructed to play in her room upon waking until we come to get her (since the past few days have been ...

Why I wrote “Beyond the Baby Blues”

(Originally published on postpartum project, as "Why I wrote "Beyond the Baby Blues") *** “If this can help one woman then it is worth it.” That was my refrain. That was what I said. That was what I typed, even when my hands trembled. In February of 2014 I made a decision that would change the trajectory of my life ...

Happy Valentine’s Day

Some stories are long. They make for long posts. Some stories feel long. And they are so exhausting that they make for short posts. This one is the latter. *** I have written so much about Valentine's Day over the years; I have written about love and gratitude; I have told stories of our past; Last year's post was particularly fun (and reminds me ...

Birth Story Revisited

Two years ago, one month before I came out with "The Hardest Post I've Ever Written" I shared my birth story. That was the first post in which I opened up about my new life, one that involved many new feelings, new emotions and, of course, a new baby. Today, as I cuddled my son on the couch, I buried ...